Life Lessons From "Fast Times At Ridgemont High"

Ron the Audio Consultant. Ratner the Movie Ticket Guy. Damone the Scalper (oops- don't let him hear me say that!). Maybe even Mr. Vargas, though he did have a hot wife.

What do they all have in common other than mall-dwelling? Three words:

Jennifer Jason Leigh.

And not a current JJL, or "Single White Female" - crazy JJL.

They loved 1982 JJL - with her cute, squishy, imperfect 1982 body, chubby round face, and that long, bushy, horse hair.

They were all over her, even fighting for her.

Most people will, of course, remember Phoebe Cates, her red bikini, and the removal thereof. Hell, I do. But even beautiful Phoebe wasn't perfect according to a 2009 perspective. She was simply unafraid and not holding back for Brad (according to Brad, anyway) - and nothing's yummier than that.

And, yes, her tits looked good.

But by today's standards - well, they were just so normal compared to what's out there now. And her legs were normal and her stomach was normal; no visible ab-crunching or over-tanning. Just a natural, pretty body on a natural, pretty girl.

So rare in 2009 - and in a movie, nonetheless. And so refreshing to see, like snow at Christmas or my kids when they're on Benadryl. Just one of life's pleasures.

And Jennifer Jason Leigh - she was completely unafraid to shed her clothes, too, and she did it without any regard to self-consciousness. Though she was very cute, she was no Phoebe Cates - which was fine by her several suitors and throngs of pubescent guys from the early eighties, including my husband.

They liked her attitude, her smile, and the fact that she was such a normal-looking girl. A girl who might go out with them. A girl who would laugh at their jokes instead of waiting to be admired. A girl who put the energy she could have been putting into perfecting herself into the guys she was with.

And they all took notice.

Though bodies are closer to perfect in 2009 than they've ever been in history, now that we have self-tanners, Pilates, abundant surgery and facial injections, something beautiful is simply lost in all of that. Maybe it's just a girl who's content, relaxed, and not fretting over herself. The normal, gratuitous, naked nipple-age of "Fast Times" seemed almost nostalgic.

And even though "American Pie" is hysterical, I still think people will remember Phoebe Cates over the many Playboy 'models' (what in hell are they modeling?) who always appear in those movies.

And speaking of Playboy models, there were a couple posing in bikinis with Spicoli in his own fantasy sequence - remember? Sure, they looked good, but again - by eighties standards. What made them look Playboy-good was their ease and willingness to show it.

So what can we take from all of this? That what's hot may not be what we think it is... Not that long legs and perfect tits are a bad thing.

But something about JJL lying naked in that pool house, with her small chest, chunky legs, and a little belly pouch, was just kinda - hot. She wasn't there to impress - she was there to have a good time. A fast time, if you will - (by the way, I hate when people say "if you will...").

Would she even be cast by today's standards? Hard to say, but "Fast Times" is a good reminder that what makes someone appealing isn't so much a body of perfection as willingness to suck a carrot in public.